Hannah Clive

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Hannah Clive is a singer/songwriter who has performed on  BBC Introducing in London . This was followed by   a live performance   on BBC Radio London where she was personally invited to perform by respected BBC host Gaby Roslin. She has since appeared on The Jimmy Star Show with Ron Russell – the show attracts four million viewers –  and she’s done loads of other good stuff, yada yada …….

Being quite intelligent – for a woman – she realised that despite being invited to perform for all these earthlings there was one burning ambition which had not  been fulfilled – to be featured as one of Megastar Gongle’s hidden gems – so she plucked up all her courage and asked me if I would consider her for the series:-)

I hadn’t heard her sing at this stage but I agreed ‘cos she’s very pretty! I have since listened to her and she can sing so that’s a bonus, unfortunately, like most human females she is just interested in having fun as you’ll see when you watch this first video:

Oh Hannah! Hannah! No wonder that man got mad! He’s just come home after a hard day’s graft to find you sitting on the sofa strumming your guitar! I can’t believe his dinner wasn’t ready and he had to get himself a frozen meal! What were you thinking? Tch! I wouldn’t put up with that either!

Also what could be more fun than making your house look beautiful? He even got the paint tray and roller ready for you! TCH!

And …. Why did you drag him away from that jewellery shop when he was clearly intent on buying you an expensive looking ring? I thought diamonds were a girl’s best friend!

‘ Oh Gongle dear Gongle! His meal wasn’t frozen, it was a Taste The Difference, only took 3 mins to cook and at least I’d thought of getting one in for him – he didn’t starve. All this whilst balancing my own artistic endeavours, be they painting or music? That’s called multi-tasking dear heart and whilst I appreciate it may come as a shock to you – its something we lady humans can do? Clearly he can’t even cook a meal and make a point poor love, without getting cross and knocking paint all over the gaff. Besides, making the house beautiful was my idea. There I go again multitasking: earning money songwriting AND getting the right emulsion and rollers from Wickes whilst looking cute with paint on my nose –  talent, economy and beauty? Little wonder I dragged him away from the ‘sparklies’ –  I could never marry a man who messed up my guitar like that…”

Blimey! Take a breath dear! 🙄🙄🙄

As well as being pretty, funny and talented – no wonder we clicked! – Hannah has a sensitive side. She tells me that the title of her latest single ‘Remember to breathe’  is a reference to the fact that when the shit hits the fan and you panic, it helps to concentrate on your breathing; so too, it’s a reference to those who feel suicidal but instead do not take their life. As this is the case I won’t make any jokes, as I am prone to do, but simply introduce you to this powerful song:

https://hannahclive.bandcamp.com/track/remember-to-breathe

Now, since starting to write this article I have fallen in love with and proposed to Hannah so I finally asked her the question that caused my last fiancee to run off into the wilderness and was surprised at her answer!

Hannah, My last girlfriend ran a mile when I told her that in Grimney when you get married the lady has to sign a contract to agree that if the man realises he has made a mistake the marriage can be null and void within six months. She asked why the same doesn’t apply to the woman and I told her not to be silly! How could any woman make a mistake in marrying the one and only Megastar Gongle who would give her a mansion to live in, a platinum card with no limit and servants to do her bidding! She got angry and said she wanted to earn her OWN money!! So I just want to ask if you understand the contract? If so I will go ahead and order the bananas for the wedding breakfast – as my favourite things are banana butties:-)

‘I do understand the Grimney pre-nup…where do I sign? I’ve got the lawyer on the phone now so can ask him to give it the once over given we’re agreed on short version and the good faith discussions are over ? 😉’

Of course your lawyer can give it the once over dearest … as long as he’s qualified in Grimney law:-) See that AnMarie? She asked me where she signs! THIS is one intelligent woman!

Now, where were we? Oh yes <Gongle is a bit flustered to learn that finally one earthling understands him> I’ll let you listen to another song whilst I order lots of bananas…….

Did you write that about me after I proposed? It sums up perfectly how I make the ladies feel!😂

‘Gongle I would of course love to say that I had written Fire about you my dear but that would imply intimacy pre-nuptials and in this British part of the world – that would never do! So the ‘Who’ will have to remain a matter of conjecture, rather like Carly Simon’s ‘You’re So Vain’ – and one to which only I know the answer. Alas there are many who think they make the ladies feel this way but seemingly very few who actually can. Although I’m sure with your intergalactic experience and dexterity Gongle – you’d probably give it a jolly good go! But from experience, those consumed with themselves tend not to be able to fall into this category, since they mostly serve themselves…unlike the person in my song proving such a revelation – I wrote a song about it.’

Those consumed with themselves?? What are you trying to say my dear! <strokes chin and looks pensive> OH You mean like Morton Balthus? Yes, yes I see what you mean sweetheart 😃He thinks he’s a ladies clam!

Here’s an interesting fact that you may not know about Hannah: Her late father was TV and film actor John Clive who appeared in The Italian Job, The pink panther strikes again, A clockwork orange, the Carry on films and numerous TV series’. He also voiced John Lennon in the Beatles’ film ‘Yellow submarine. On top of that he authored several books including the international best-seller KG200 a story about a secret Luftwaffe unit during the Second world war.

Obviously talent runs in the Clive family:-)

To learn more about Hannah – and there is lots more to learn – visit the following links:

hannahclive.com

Thank you Hannah for being ….well …. a gem:-)

Also as I always say please support this lovely lady by buying her music!

Don’t forget you can catch up with all the previous gems here: https://megastargongle.wordpress.com/links/

 

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